The 2.5-year trap: why we stay in jobs we don't like and how to find one you do

913 days.

21, 912 hours.

2.5 years.

That’s a looooooong time feeling ignored, resentful, and lonely.

And, no, we’re not talking about your loser of an ex ;)

We’re talking about your JOB!

Because studies have shown employees who are dissatisfied with their jobs tend to stay on average 2.5 years longer than those who are satisfied. 

2.5 YEARS!

And this breaks our hearts.

Because no one should have to waste thousands of hours of their time and happiness in a place they don’t want to be.

But the change must start with you.

So why are we staying so long in jobs we don’t like?

And how can you build the courage to make the move into the purpose-led career of your dreams? 

In this article, we’ll cover the main reasons why people stay and how you can quickly leap over these major life roadblocks.

Getting stuck in our comfort zones 

The start of a new role tends to be full of excitement and learning, meeting new people and pushing ourselves. 

At this point we are firmly in the learning zone, making us feel creative, resourceful and able to deal with challenges. 

We’re eager to prove ourselves and time flies. But as time goes on, if we don’t continue to experience challenges or change we can fall quickly into our comfort zones. 

Comfort zones can be fine for a time, but stay in them too long and they can lead to boredom and complacency. The longer we stay, the more daunting it becomes to leave. 

This explains why a Gallup study found that people who are enjoying their work are more likely to leave than those who are not. 

People who are enjoying their work are likely to have more confidence and drive for learning which is so appealing to prospective employers. 

The risk that the grass won’t be greener 

Better the devil you know than the devil you don't. 

We often hear that people are nervous to change roles in case the situation isn’t any better. These nerves feed the negative sides of our brain and make us ask questions like: 

“What if I can’t find a job that will pay me as much?”

“What if I’m not as good in the next role?”

“What if I don’t like it?”

After we’ve asked ourselves all of these ‘what if’s’ we’re far too demotivated to start writing a glowing cover letter or kickass CV. 

This fear of failure causes inertia that keeps us in a ‘freeze’.

The result?

Years of your life and potential wasted just ‘getting on with it’ and living for the weekend

You know you deserve better, right?

Not knowing what to do next 

Of course one of the most essential elements of finding a new job is knowing what you’d like to do. 

For some lucky ones, this is the easy part. But for others, this can be the biggest blocker of them all. 

When we’re not sure what we want, it becomes far easier just to stay put, until the lightning bolt of inspiration comes to guide us. 

But did you ever hear about the frog in boiling water? If you put a frog in a pot of boiling water it will jump out and save itself. But put it in tepid water and bring it to the boil and it gets cooked! 

Sound familiar? 

What we’re saying is that waiting on inspiration can be a risky, and very drawn-out strategy. 

So what can we do? 

Moving out of your comfort zone 

Comfort zones are all about confidence. To build your confidence and start moving back into your learning zone try following these three steps 

1. Identify your zone - what does your work comfort zone look like, where are its parameters and edges?

2. Start small - what would working 10% outside your comfort zone look like? Where could you experiment with this tomorrow?

3. Commit to growth - Setting intentions are a powerful tool to help with our goals. Set your intention to be committed to growth and watch your actions follow. 

De-risking your career move 

There might be lots of fears keeping us stuck or just one persistent one. 

To begin de-risking your next job move ask yourself the following questions: 

What fear is holding me back?

What would I do if I knew I couldn’t fail?

What would make this risk worth it? 

Another great way to lower the perception of risk is to find examples of people who have made the changes you’d like to make and succeeded. 

This is because it’s very hard for our own prehistoric brains to accept change. 

We’re hardwired to believe our negative thoughts so creating positive scenarios for ourselves is difficult. Borrowing from other’s examples is a much easier way to see a positive route forward and give you the boost of confidence you need. 

Finding your path 

We all have that friend who knew what they wanted to be from the age of 4 and is pursuing their dream job. 

But for most of us, building a career path is far less clear-cut. 

We spoke to Flo Parker, from Flo Coaching, a career coaching specialist who helps women stuck in career ruts take control of their careers and find work they love. 

Here are Flo’s top tips on how to find your path. 

“Most of the clients I work with are at a crossroads where they don’t know what they want to do next and some of them have been at this point for years,” Flo says.

“Often this is because they’ve lost their work identity at some point and have become attached to a title or role that has become so niched to the company they’re in, they feel lost at where their skills could take them.”

Flo offers her clients a simple 3-step process to smooth out and accelerate their job search/career change.

Step 1: Know your strengths

“There are lots of strengths finder tools out there but with my clients, I always recommend a combination of personal reflection and outsourcing input.

Take 60 seconds now to write down your top 20 strengths. Time yourself! See what comes up.

Ask a colleague, a friend and a family member to tell you your top three strengths.”

Step 2: Identify your values

“What is most important to you in life and work?

What expectations do you have of a company and of yourself?

These are really important questions to be able to answer. They may take a while to narrow down but knowing your values is deeply empowering and essential for finding work you enjoy.”

Step 3: Focus on the job.

“What work do you actually want to do?

What tasks in the day do you find give you energy and keep you focused? 

Where do you get most distracted and disengaged?

A lot of jobseekers look at titles but not closely enough at the actual description of work. What you’ll do day-to-day is far more important than what the job is called (which is usually always negotiable).” 

We hope this article has helped you to break down some of the blockers to changing careers. If you’re ready to start searching for your next purpose-led role, take a look at our job board! 

Happy Searching! 

*** References

1. A study published in the Journal of Vocational Behavior in 2017 found that employees who were dissatisfied with their jobs tended to stay an average of 2.5 years longer compared to those who were satisfied.

2. Another study by Gallup in 2017 revealed that actively disengaged employees (those who were unhappy and unproductive) were more likely to stay in their jobs than engaged employees. The study reported that actively disengaged employees had an average tenure of 7.2 years, while engaged employees had an average tenure of 4.7 years.